Periodical Punctuations of Positivity.

Well, as much as I am...rather loath to admit it. Not dressing up in Khakis and red polo shirts these last two weeks have been goddamn liberating. I do miss having a job. The constant struggle to help, being productively busy instead of busy to bypass boredom, the constant prospect of an income knowing I would be safe. All of that is gone leaving me bored, restless, highly irritable, and broke. Yet I couldn't be more pleased! Well....no, no, no need to quibble with myself about something like loneliness. All people still suffering it understand my meaning. Without the net of safety and responsibility Things simply seem...more enjoyable.


For the last several days we've played video games (while sud soaked) and gone to the bar for karaoke. Yesterday we rambled on to see The Possession. A fairly decent movie with a really really good ending. Today I will be finished paying for Tekken Tag Tournament 2, and tomorrow the job search will continue in modesty. Have I been stupid in taking back smoking and buying books from Amazon? Yes. Have I been lazy in only searching for work in the middle of the week days instead of striving to find stability? Definitely. Do I or anyone else feel bad for it? Nope. I can possibly continue this for another two weeks before things get dire, yet doing as wanted instead of as needed is exactly the kind of mental release I've been needing.


I feel rested, and at times even hopeful. Of course there's been a few things that have...triggered me. But, they're've been less, and less, and less it seems, since leaving that hole. Two weeks, and I'm a better person who's starting to tan. Go fucking figure. Now, onwards to the bank, and my new tattoo.